Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Last raya aidilfitri as a student!

Now I am officially a PhD degree holder, alhamdulillah....I defended my work, did the viva last 5th oct 2005 and now i can actually address myself as Tengku Dr.Manal Tengku cool is that.

And more, i celebrated the eid (3rd nov, 1st shawal 1426) with a new different be honest, i didnt really get that "excited" once they announced to me (i.e. the internal and external examiners) that i've passed my was more liek a relief then....after that i fell sick for nearly 2 weeks! My blood pressure rose high esp the diastolic one and i got into the hospital one saturday 22nd oct during ramadhan.....luckily , my other organs and overall body system are still functioning like normal except the hypertensive i am on this beta blocker pill, atenolol, to help minimise thus reduce the diastolic pressure back to the healthy, normal was a bit scary i must admit....what with heart palpitation, body temperature had risen to fever level and so on.....They did all the basic test on me, like temperature taking, mammogram for blood pressure, ECG for the heart, urine and blood tests as well as X-Ray for the chest....the only thing left now is kidney, renal X-ray....i think it's basically a breakdown body indicating me the extreme fatigueness....good thing it happened after my viva....though i still have to do some minor correction on my thesis.

I celebreated eid, doing the normal routione like eid prayers at malaysia hall on that thursday morning, 3rd nov, and then followed by visiting my fren's fren place. After that i went to the NHS ar south ken for the followup. Then i went on me own to Hicom's place in hampstead heath. Friday, i am off to birmingham, berkompol raya dgn kakak and adek perempuan's family there. I came back to london yesterday, monday.

Oh well...alhamdulillah i am getting much better now...i still have to watch my salt intake per day as a precaution.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

sultan brunei's second wifey

Hmmm.....delectable or just another bigamy practiser...lucky TV3 personality, azrinaz mazhar hakim has just become the sultan of brunei's 2nd wife...talking about being a multi-billionaire heiress....(report:telegraph , berita harian, utusan)

Friday, August 19, 2005

Letters of "who speak on behalf of british muslims" and GAZA reality check

Ready with ur fan/air-cond switched on! Letters published in the The Independence

Maybe I read too much of Robert Ludlum's novels...but I could not help myself reading and pondering about the too many conspiracy theories ever since Homer's Iliad: Troy. An interesting opinion on Gaza reality check from IHT is just one of the millions opinions unbiased and backed with unambiguous reasons. People like Dan Brown who captured many people on his theories regarding Da Vinci Code...controversial it is undoubtedly, but it is fascinating indeed. Then, i was thinking of reasons why some people had the nerves to discuss on such sensitive matters, when they obviously have their own hidden agendas. More than a decade ago, books like Satanic Verses by Salman Rushdie has been and still is provocative especially to the practised muslims. That and the london bombing episodes happened because of the angry and frustrated people (can i say openly that they are muslim to the muslim hardliners without getting some bashes? I think better not. I'm simply a humanitarian muslim praying for peace and harmony and mutual understanding at least 75% on earth). What is the difference between you muslims attacking other people who disregard u and those christians and jews who blamed anyone other than themselves for any atrocity?

So some say justice is to be avenged, pay blood with blood and stuff. Well, what can i say, this world aint becoming a utopia, far from approaching it. The best deal is to find any possibility to reach some kinda equilibrium point or a buffer point. Happy living in a cynical world!

The vindicated one: Mr.Anwar Ibrahim

The ones where he won the libel case:
USD1.2million richer ; guardianreport ; RM4.5m banked in

He won apologies from ex-inspector general rahim noor earlier this week: infamous black-eyed "peace" ; from the guardian and from the BBC

Never ceased to surprise me...

of cockroaches and muslims

Londonistan? what those french journalist has to say: muslim are not cockroaches

More interesting thoughts about muslim polemics around the world:

A controversy, really? : fatwa feud

So, every religion has its own hardliners, extremists, what else is new?? : another muslim-hindu epic in mahabhrata

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Sandhurst, 12th August 2005

(i wrote this on the 17th jan. I had to delay it due to inevitable circumstances).

This is the 1st time ever i've been in an army academy....never been to one in malaysia, and i premiered my visit at the Sandhurst Military college down in surrey. It was actually for the graduation day of a fren, faiz, who was introduced by azizah. I went there with his family, abg iberahim, kak zu and his baby sister, hakimah.

It was really a new experience all together for me....having had the opportunity to be in a place of long military history both for the royal england family as well as for the malaysian elites dated back as far as pre-malaysia independence time.

To make it more eventful, the current malaysian sultan was given the honour to officiate this graduation ceremony. The national anthem, negaraku was played as the main anthem next to the UK's God save the queen and our own national flag was erected on the main pole. Bit of a patriotic feelings there i hafta say....

Monday, August 08, 2005

gone is the famous muslim daiee

Sheikh ahmad deedat passed away today (islamonline)

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

march to June

Mostly busying meself with thesis writing not so much of a story to tell except been listening to my fren, azizah's problems...

july 2005 story

Coming soon.......

Saturday, March 12, 2005

steel fortune: Lakshmi Mittal's story

Forbes has just renewed its billionaire list and one of the newcomers who hit the top-ten list, 3rd after bill gates and warren buffet is an indian steel tycoon, lakshmi mittal. Read more in Forbes about Manal Ismail as the future Billionaire.....

zero gravity roti canai, please

BBC representative in malaysia reported about how malaysian astronauts cannot "survive" without having their food in the outerspace. Local favs like roti canai has underwent some "thorough" research on how to have it eaten at zero gravity.

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Good london websites

If u wanna search on whats going on in london, click on London town

You may also wanna look at and you'll get email updates when u register with them for free. and offer a comprehensive UK map just by typing in the postcode or the name of the street of the adress.

Of course, we need to know about updated london weather and transport conditions and so, you may check them at Transportforlondon and BBC Weather , ITV weather , Channel4 weather and SKY weather.

Comprehensive dictionary list is a one-stop dictionary search with links to, cambridge dictionary, merriam-webster's online dictionary, MSN Encarta, and etc. for eg. if you type in the word "blog", you will find list of definitions and links to other dictionary websites. It also offers links to business, science, medicine, slangs online dictionaries and above all, it is FREE.

My frequent islamic websites

These are the sites that i normally visit:

1. Islamicity
4. AlJazeera

And as for prayers time, I normally go to:

1. Islamic finder
2. Islamic Cultural Centre , thats in Regents Park, London.

Good computing site

I like these two sites, and would recommend anyone to have a look:

2. Computer shopper

Mikal and I

Our friendship began approximately 3 yrs ago, but we only got to know each other much, much better since 2 and a half years ago...When i first arrived in imperial college to do my PhD, he was already in his 2nd year PhD and he was still trying to recover from his father's death. We met through mutual friends, which are also our circle of friends...they are lina (petlin), sue (pet aya), hekarl (pet bulu), zamri (legam aka abg am), and mikal (or i sometimes call him mimmy).

We became rather close after this silly misunderstanding on a Circle Line tube on our way to bayswater.

I'll continue with my story on him later on.

Thai and Malaysian women socio-economy power boosted

The Star has reported that Thai and Malaysian women are approximately on a par with their male counterparts in socio-economic level with respect to their countries. The survey was conducted by MasterCard International in conjunction with the International Women's Day today (Tuesday, 8th March 2005).

Michael Jackson Trial

Whether he is guilty or not, God knows. Nonetheless, it never fails to attract the world attention since 1993.

UK main links to Michael Jackson Trials:
1. The Times Online
2. Guardian
3. BBC
4. Yahoo! UK

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Fat Actress

Weight problem? underweight? overweight? .....Kirsty Allen of Cheers and Look
Who's Talking fame has her own story which turns into a sitcom called Fat Actress. It will premier in the US next Monday, 14th March 2005 (reuters ) and it will feature some famous hollywood celebs like John Travolta and rock singer Kid Rock.

Some of the highlights includes fat men and skinny wives which will definitely incite mixed reviews and literally delivering some slaps to the hollywood husbands.

Monday, March 07, 2005

News bits

Anti-muslim in european countries as a result of the infamous 11th September 2001 WTC bombing incidents has always been debatable topic among EU countries. More story on BBC news.

One example of Mossad's successful intelligence: Tzvi Milchman .He managed to capture Nazi war criminal Adolf Eichmann,where he was put on trial in Jerusalem and hanged in 1962. That reminded me of another famous Mossad-trained lady,Cheryl Bentov who lured Mordechai Vanunu, the nuclear plant whistle-blower to Rome before he was drugged and sent back to Israel to face trial and was sentenced for 18 years prison.

BP is expanding their oil exploration in Indonesia.BP has seen profits boom in recent years, driven higher by record crude prices and greater investment in exploration. Annual profits in 2004 jumped 26% to $16.2bn. Well, hopefully, Indonesia will benefit more from it and hence, a fair distribution of wealth for the Indonesian, esp after Tsunami catastrophy.

O immigrant workers, where art thou? Palm oil producers in Malaysia have began to voice their sheer concern ever since the immigrants have been ordered to return home.

Friday, March 04, 2005

Talk about prejudice at the expense of nation pride

General Knowledge:

What is a semite? A semite is a member of a group of Semitic-speaking peoples of the Middle East and northern Africa. Semitic is an adjective which in common parlance mistakenly refers specifically to Jewish things, while the term actually refers to things originating among speakers of Semitic languages or people descended from them, and in a linguistic context to the northeastern subfamily of Afro-Asiatic. (more ref on semitic: Semitic)

Ken Livingstone (controversial mayor of London) is unrepentable on his "anti-semitic" comment in which he maintained his refusal to apologise for likening a Jewish reporter to a Nazi concentration camp guard. He continued his personal bashing and voicing out his opinion at: comment ;

Therefore if someone is anti-semitic, he/she is also anti-arab, anti-jewish and those who belongs under the semite group. Then, we may be thinking of the whole "by-proxy practicing". Are we the victim of the world propaganda or just couldn't be bothered to find out or listen to different parties about what is actually going on around us. But on second thought, one needs to be open-minded and tries to avoid any prejudging under no circumstances while seeking the knowledge. One cannot afford to be biased and prejudiced and should not attempt to come up with unsolicited opinion when it comes to sensitive issues.

Tuesday, February 22, 2005


snow turun yeay...snowing....yeayyy....ok...cheesy but aint give a fuck on that....snowfall always give me some kinda cheap thrill...nostalgic too...those white fluffy thingy....

Monday, February 21, 2005

Siti nurhaliza does solo concert at royal albert hall

Siti nurhaliza's another triumph, check it out at:

royal albert hall

Siti's fan all around malaysia, indonesia, and among those who dwells around the world must be really proud of siti's latest achievement in getting the opportunity she has long sought to perform at royal albert hall, london. To those who are studying or has studied at Imperial College London, this royal albert hall is pretty much significant as one of the college's remarkable neighbouring tourist spot as well as one of the oldest london landmark. It is also where the college graduation day takes place.

Back in 1989, Allahyarham (late) Sudirman Majid won his asia's best performer title there....almost everytime i walk pass the building, some sudirman's song came into my mind...and now, it could also be siti's monumental nostalgia....In fact, siti did perform a tribute concert for sudirman few years ago, singing his songs on solo and duets and even donning his famous jalur gemilang, the national flag costume.

I have met her in person once 2 years ago, and took picture next to her as well...Evidently i am not one of her ardent fans, but i have my sincere respect and admiration for her for having achieved a successful singing career at youthful age and created a strong niche in malaysian entertainment genre.

Bloggers to the rescue

How important it is nowadays to be more computer, in particular, internet savvy these days:

Global blogger action day called (

One Giant Kyoto Protocol-spoiler

And they say they rule the scheming and conniving is that....

Kyoto Protocol comes into force (
Malaysia's uncivil civil servants (ref:

Hmmm.....opening another can of worms or another "forced" way of educating these people....i wonder.....
An informative article: Islamic encounters of the third kind

Ronnie O'Sullivan wins again & Beckhams 3rd son

Ronnie O' Sullivan has done it again, this time winning his second snooker masters champion...yeayyy!!!!,,3-2005081964,00.html,,,4-1493759,00.html

Meanwhile, Victoria Beckham just gave birth to another baby boy named Cruz , in Madrid....lucky david beckham to have bestowed with 3 healthy boys. I wonder which side of his physique wud he "carve" another tattoo for the newborn.,,2-2005082033,00.html

late valentine flowers

Last thursday eve, arif came and presented me with a bouquet of roses as a...well...late valentine i supposed and also (most probably) as a "token of apology" (hows that sound? cheesy or what...) did cheer me up the fact that it's been ages since a guy gave me flowers...the last one i got was on my bday last year given by my frens as a bday gift. He wore his traditional bengali costume that eve, a black one...

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

the wedding in birmingham

Friday, 4th Feb 2005, maka terciptalah satu sejarah (another history was created), both my friends got married in birmingham. The guy was my admirer and the lady is one of my block mates. After only two months they knew each other, they finally agreed to tie the knot on that friday....actually it was supposed to be on the next day, saturday afternoon but the imam had to rush to yemen for some urgent reason that he had to change the nikah date.

I cudnt make it to the nikah ceremony as it was at 4pm in birmingham and i already bought a coach ticket for 6pm outward journey. Anyways, when i arrived, i went to my eldest sis, amirah's place 1st with aishah who happened to travel together with me from london. After dinner, yazid the groom came to pick us up to his place where all of us gather (meeting point). Waheedah and hanis were already there, just resting down while azizah was serving supper (more likely to me) to us (me, aishah, fiza, waheedah and hanis). We all slept in yazid's small room. I cudnt help but was a bit "amazed" by the condition of the house....surely, it's for the cheap rent and acts as a basic shelter only....

The next day, after a lovely breakfast, prepared by azizah, meehoon goreng with sotong and taugeh, we decided to go to the city centre together to buy azizah's bridal shoes and bag. More of azizah's frens came that day. Waheedah and hanis left around 5pm back to london that eve coz they had another farewell party to attend to on sunday afternoon. So, it was down to me,fiza and aisha to continue searching for the items and finally we found the ones we liked after like 3 hrs.

That saturday evening, sbb tak mandi lagi that day and also coz i must spend some time with my sis's family, so i called abg isa to pick me up and stayed over their place. We had roasted chicken and doner kebab for dinner that eve....and of course a nice hot shower.

Sunday morning, i got ready for the wedding reception. Yazid picked me up from my sis' place to his place, and we all got ready from there...we helped azizah with her wedding dress and makeup. At around 1.30pm, we all left to the reception venue which was around 10mins drive away. When we reached there, people were already waiting for us...sambutan agakla meriah...the food was superb , far from my expectations...It was really my 1st time ever attending my own fren's wedding in the UK. I sat at the main table, together with the bride and groom...Fiza was her pengapit and me, hasmy and zila were azizah's bridesmaids...funny,the pengapit and bridesmaids are all unmarried, or shud i say "old"maids..hehehe.....oh well....

I left on that sunday evening, feeling rather satisfied (what with all the lovely makanan pengantin and wonderful reception) and tired. I am really happy for both the bride and groom.

Wedding photos :
1. Courtesy from Aishah Rehan
2. Courtesy from Fiza

Monday, January 31, 2005

australian open, another surprise

The tennis grand slam opened with new winners but certainly not new faces. Marat Safin from russia won the men single while Serena Williams (USA) won the women title. Roger Federer (Swiss) and Maria Sharapova (russia) , both the king and queen of last year's grand slam, havent warmed up yet as they lost to their respective grand slam winners during the semifinal stage. much for tennis...

As for football, Chelsea is advancing to the FA cup final having reached the top spot on the score table.

Today, i applied for accomodation contract renewal for maybe another 6 months or so...But i really hope i can manage to complete my PhD thesis during this last 6 months of "the kesian punya" extra time. Kena kuat semangat, keep up my motivation level and continue to persevere insha allah.

Arif has just begun his normal office hour work today after struggling to kickstart their old business for nearly a year or so....

My nephew, asim and niece, aliyyah both kena chicken the same time, i dah booked ticket to birmingham this friday....hmmm...semoga dijauhkan dari jangkitan penyakit2 berjangit, ameen......yesterday was asim's 4th bday. Poor boy, celebrating his bday when he's down with that chicken pox fever...I remembered that i had it once when i was 12 yrs old...It left me with some scars on my body and one spot on my forehead.

Saturday, January 29, 2005

October 2002 Posted by Hello

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

eidul adha 02

That eve, arif came to college and we both walked hand in hand along brompton rd and took bus 414 from opposite harrods to paddington. There, we went to the paddington stn, just for his old time sake...had bit of coffee and went home together. We bought food from fatima takeaway and stopped by azizah's place, where i introduced him to hasmy.

It was unplanned yet we managed to be together for eid.

Friday, January 21, 2005

Eidul Adha

Today, 20th Jan 2005 is eid adha celebration, bersamaan 10 zulhijjah 1425H.

Spt biasa pagi ke msia hall, solat raya , went with azizah...then ke mawar sbb ade small jamuan sana...about an hour after that, hekal and hasmy came there...and makan2 la skali....

Seronok nya sbb finally i dah complete my qadha' puasa ramadhan and managed to puasa sunat wuquf arafah skali....

Monday, January 17, 2005

Saturday, 15th Jan 2005

We spent another evening alone that friday. 14th. On saturday he said he wud call me if he wanna join me for abi's bday celebration...Earlier in the eve, azizah and yazid once again invited for another dinner extravaganza at her place, and invited more people there....on friday he served crab and chicken dishes and saturday, fish feast...

Then at 7.30pm i left to zen bar, in marylebone, and was the 1st one arrived there....that night i made frens with 2 of her frens, emeka and tokunbo (toks)....abi told me that her frens were checking on me and i was the hotcake of the evening. That night, toks drove me home and i slept at azizah's.

He showed a bit of an attitude earlier on saturday before he left...which ended with me consoling him...he can really gets on my nerves at times...but patience is the only thing that prevails....i had to tell him about the concept of to love and be loved in return and the importance of putting up with each other as part of the love ordeal.

On sunday evening i pondered about it...about the truth to what he has been saying before that he needed me more than i do. I guess it does live up to its mentioning....and i reckon i just need to bear with it, till he regain his inner-strength....i know it's all about give and take and the concept of yin and yang....but at the same time i want him to understand that he should see my points...well, it takes time for him to really digest the whole thing and ultimately understand that i meant good. As long as he is able to open up to me coz i know he really loves me from the bottom of his heart and so, i need to be wise enuf to deal with such delicate situation. It all boils down to the fact that he has different upbringing and he has faced with so much obstacles that sometimes it has taken its toll. Never too late to learn from our own me, it's my personal self-development and will continue to improve myself....

Well, so much for the evening blunder.....

date of birth and personality

forwarded from srkbbb8388 mailing list email.

Were you born with a quirk or a plain simple soul? Have fun with this fun personality prediction guide.

IF you were born on the 1st, 10th, 19th, 28th of any month you are number 1.
If you were born on the 2nd, 11th, 20th, 29th of any month then you are number 2.
If you were born on the 3rd, 12th, 21st, 30th of any month then you are number 3.
If you were born on the 4th, 13th, 22nd, 31st of any month then you are Number 4.
If you were born on the 5th, 14th, 23rd of any month then you are number 5.
If you were born on the 6th, 15th, 24th of any month then you are number 6.
If you were born on the 7th, 16th, 25th of any month then you are number 7.
If you were born on the 8th, 17th, 26th of any month then you are number 8.
If you were born on the 9th, 18th, 27th of any month then you are number 9.

Number 1
You are smart, a straight talker, funny, stubborn, hardworking, honest, jealous on a competitive basis, kind hearted, temperamental, friendly, and popular. You always want to be on the top and most likely to be independent. You are most likely to fall in love at a young age, but will marry once you mature! You are likely to have problems with people who have opposite views and you are most likely to take revenge over your enemies in a long time basis. You are a spender, but you will have a good profession in the future. If you are guy you will be very popular. You can go anywhere from the local shop to the heart of the parliament because you are positive and talented in numerous areas. But in your life you will always have some people who will work hard to bring you & your name down. Because of your intelligence, some might hate you. You are a pioneer, independent & original your best match is 4,6,8 while a good match would be with 3,5,7

Number 2
No matter what, every one will love you because you are ruled by the Moon. You day dream a lot, you have a very low-self esteem, you need to have a back up for every move in your life, you are very unpredictable. You tend to change according to time and circumstances, selfish, have a very strong sense of musical and artistic talent and powerful verbal communication. You can be sweet as an angel and can be ruthless when double-crossed. Some might say you have a sixth sense. You will become a poet, writer, an artist or a businessperson. You are not strong in love, so your relationship will be in disarray until you settle down. If you are a girl, you will be responsible for your family. If you are a man, you tend to get involve in fights & arguments in the family. You will sacrifice your life for your family. You are gentle, intuitive with a broad vision. You make a well-balanced person. Your best match is 2, 7,5, and 9 no other people can put up with you!!!

Number 3
You are hardhearted and selfish most of the time. You always tend to have lots of problems within your family in the early stages but you will be able to cope with everything. You seem to have your way in everything. And from birth you would always have to work hard to achieve anything you want. You always make a point to set examples on others, especially the younger ones. Generally you are not a cool person. It's not easy dealing with you. A tough player you are! But once you are comfortable with someone, it will be a lasting friendship. You always earn respect from others. Your Ilk seems to have lots of worries and problems but they won't be for long. You will have brilliant kids! You love money a bit too much so temptation will push you to try endlessly. You will look after your family and help friends, so you will spend a life time just being generous and kind (except for men born on the 21st). You love your freedom, creative and ambitious, a person who brings beauty, hope & joy to this world!!! Your best match 6 and 9. Good match 1, 3, and 5

Number 4
You are very very hard working but unlucky in important matters in life, very cool and helpful. You might repel people away from you, you may cause nuisance to others if you area man, as you gifted are with understanding other people's problems. If you are a girl, you excel in your studies and arts. If you are a guy you spend most of your time with girl friends and you tend to have too much fun with your mates & girls.Your friends will spend your time & money and get on with their life and you will be left empty handed. So be careful! You love to spend. Your positive side is that you are always around to help family and friends. You always fall in love with those younger than you. You often live with disappointments but you will take good care of your family. You need to be careful of people who will take advantage of your kind heart. And beware of your relationships too. You are radical, patient, persistent, and a hit old-fashioned; you live with foundation & order. Your best match 1, 8. Good match 5, 6, and 7

Number 5
You are very popular and you can get things done only by talking. Even to your enemies! You are business-minded and like to do things spontaneously. You will be famous if you get involved in any business. Your friends and families will always ask for your help, and you are the one actually with the money to help your friends.You will have more than one relationship, but when you settle down you tend to be selfish. You tend to go for other relationships - even if you are married at times because of your popularity. You tend to get along easily with anyone because the numbers is a middle number. You love freedom and changes. You learn your life through your personal experiences. Your best match 1, 2, Good match 6, 8.

Number 6
Ooopppss.. you were born to enjoy! You don't care about others. I mean you always wanted to have a lifetime of enjoyment. You will excel in either education or business management! You are talented, kind (but with only people who you think are nice), and popular. All good things come easily to you. Your mind and body is just made perfect for love. You are loveable by any number. But if you are a number 6 men, you will be involved in more than a few relationships until you get married. If you are a girl, most of you will get married/engaged early. You are a caring person towards your family and friends. You are a person of compassion, comfort & fairness, domestic responsibility, good judgment, and after all you can heal this world's wounds to make peace for everyone because you have the great power and caring talent to take the world of love one step further.. Your best match 1, 6, and 9. Good match 4, 5

Number 7
You are realistic, confident, happy, and talented in education, music, art, singing, and most importantly in acting. You also have a bad temper! You value your family status a lot; you will be in the top rank when you reach a certain age. If you are a guy you are popular with girls. Most of the number 7s face lots of problems with their married life. Only a few are happy. You have everything in your life but with worries throughout your lifetime. You need to get ready looking for a partner rather than waiting. If you don't, then you might end-up being single. You are born to contribute to everyone's joy. Your best match is 2. Good matches are 1,4

Number 8
You have a very strong personality and people will find it hard to understand you. You are more likely to suffer in your younger years. You might be also the one responsible to look out for your family. You often suffer all the way through life. You will learn life in a very practical way. You are the one who will fight for justice and may even die in the war too. You are normally very reserved with a handful of friends and most of the time, live life alone and always prepared to help others. However, once you settle down, (which is often late), then your had lucks will disappear. You will face unexpected problems such as encountering poisonous animals, and accidents. You are highly- disciplined, persistence, and courageous, and it is your strength that will take you to success. You are a great part of a family team. You are a fighter! Your Best match 1. 4, and 8. Good match 5

Number 9
You guys are the most incompatible people in the world. You are so strong, physically and mentally. You often have big-aims. You will work hard and will think it's still hard to get there, even if you already have gotten there! Normally you suffer in the early age from family problems and generally you will have to fight in life. You are respected by others. You were however very naughty in your childhood, and often got beaten up by your parents and had been involved in fights and you seemed to have suffered lots of injuries. But when you grow older you become calm and will fall into the quiet and dignified macho type. Love is not an easy matter for you. You are however good in engineering or banking jobs because people always trust you. Your family life is very good, but you will always worry over your children. Your finer qualities are that you are humanitarian, patient, very wise & compassionate. You are born to achieve targets and serve every one equally without any prejudice. You are a role model for everyone. Your best match 3, 5,6, and 9. Good match 2

Monday, January 10, 2005

Not that i rely on horoscope!

It's not that i am relying on whatever the horoscope says and all is merely some basic guide so as to give some basic insight about me n of my reliable horoscope source is from It has all the pros and cons elements and it is unbiased....u wont left feeling in distress or overjoyed after reading them...but obviously not my ultimate guide......believe me, there are 100 millions of us sharing the very same bday and so it isnt something one cud totally rely islam, fortune telling is forbidden for the reason of whatever will happen is under allah's knowledge and it might be misused for personal interests. However, to me, it's just giving me some on-the-surface idea, nothing more than that.....

Cancer and Capricorn

Love match:
Cancer and Capricorn,,160750_162844,00.html

When Cancer and Capricorn make a love match, it's a celestial pairing of great tenacity and determination. Capricorn, the Sea Goat, is focused on logic and Cancer brings emotional intensity to the relationship. Both hold one another to high standards tempered by mutual respect. In a Capricorn lover, Cancer finds dedication, and in return Capricorn comes to love Cancer's persistence. These two Signs from opposite sides of the Zodiac can come together to create a very successful and secure connection.

This relationship grows from a strong foundation of material and emotional security. Both Signs can be depended on to make frugal, conservative decisions. It doesn't have to be all solemnity, though, as Cancer can help their hardworking Capricorn lover to relax a little at the end of the day, to take time to enjoy the rewards of all that work. Cancer will also be the one to polish and preserve the fruits of their shared accomplishments; Cancer is the keeper of nostalgia and cherished memories and possessions. Capricorn moves Cancer toward achievement and keeps in check their Crab-like tendencies, enlightening Cancer to the more important matters of the world outside their own easily bruised heart. This relationship succeeds if there is an ironclad commitment and a stable, traditional, home environment.

The Moon (Emotion) rules Cancer, and Saturn (Karma) rules Capricorn. The Moon is emotional and nurturing; it is about maternal care giving and intuition, both of which become vital to Cancer. Saturn practices integrity and discipline to achieve goals. A Cancer love mate can show their serious Capricorn companion how to enjoy life and to appreciate beauty and comfort. Mothering Cancer truly enjoys smoothing over Capricorn's hard edges. Conversely, the Sea Goat can smooth Cancer's ruffled emotional feathers by providing the sort of solid foundation that Cancer desperately craves.

Cancer is a Water Sign, and Capricorn is an Earth Sign. Earth Signs focus on possessions, Water Signs on emotion and beauty. Cancer-Capricorn partners like to surround themselves with beautiful things - a stately home, gorgeous artwork, expensive cars. Their desire to be economically stable and their love of finery ensures that this couple will work hard toward this and other shared goals.
Cancer and Capricorn are Cardinal Signs. Both are initiators, active and ardent. Their differing emotional dispositions complement each other well - Capricorn excels in getting the details of business done, and Cancer always steps in when emotional counselling is needed. These Signs will get along well if Capricorn and Cancer allow one another to use their respective individual strengths.
What's the best thing about the Cancer-Capricorn relationship? Their utter dedication to one another and their mutual commitments toward shared goals. Both are lovers of quality and of beautiful, luxurious things, and neither is afraid of hard work if that's what it takes (in fact, Capricorn would rather be working than almost anything!). Their shared passions, sense of responsibility and morality make theirs a highly compatible relationship.

09/01/2005, sunday

We celebrated his bday, a low key one at my place...we resolved our matters by choosing to stay low-profile till the day/time when we both ready to declare our commitment. I made bihun goreng, something malaysian yet a simple, light dish.

We also agreed on focusing more on pursuing with our career with my PhD especially....

These are the horoscope forecast for both of us, obtained from a fwded email from a fren of mine:

Cancer in 2005 - Balance

Finding a balance between your personal and professional lives may be one of the year's strongest challenges. For the most part, your outward life this year will go in fits and starts - alternating periods of intense activity with times of welcome rest. Enjoy the restful periods when you can. The active ones will be hectic! You'll be making radical changes in your work habits, but you'll be a lot happier for it, and in the end you'll know it was worth it. Your love life is full, and any dissatisfaction with career and money matters fades into the background. By the end of 2005, you'll feel more confident, more determined, and far more capable of making the mountains come to you!

Capricorn in 2005 - Resolution

You've got plenty of lucky breaks headed your way in 2005, friend Capricorn. The long awaited relief you've needed in your love life is around the corner, and by the end of the year you will feel much clearer about your partnerships in general. Financially, it could be a lean year, although some advance planning can help you weather the storm. Your career opportunities will expand exponentially, and you're likely to change jobs or positions this year. At times, the pressure on your job and home life may seem unbearable, but rest assured you will come through this stronger - and wiser - than ever, as more is revealed and resolved in 2005.

There is no point on talking/sharing much of our relationship to just's better for us to keep on strengthening our relationship, against all the odds n's not like i'm trying to make it totally secretive from my family, it's for the sake of our own survival...let it be an intra-relation till we r ready for the family involvement. IN other words, it's between me and him to manage our own equilibrium so to speak. All i can do is to keep on praying to allah that things will be fine so long as our love remains strong.

Oh well...those ups and downs....challenges before we cud settle down....what with different countries, culture and so on...the only thing that really holding us is our love. Not that i am so blindly in love or anything like that....i am keeping meself open-minded and open-hearted and at the same time concentrating on my own pursuits. Basically, it's all about giving each other emotional supports. I dunno what else to explain to my parents except to just avoid talking/discussing about it for this timebeing. I've been pondering about it from all aspects of view and my last resort is to sort things out between me n him. We just have to really trust each other and open up.

That xmas week really was another turning point in my relationship...him screwed it up by not contacting me at all during my mum's presence have caused all the speculations unnecessary.....hence the low profile affair.

Could it be any more complicated than this, god knows.....better still, there are more important things to be taken care of but nevertheless, it'll be part of our challenges/obstacles to test our love for each far can we endure all that, time will tell....nothing comes easy, so they guts, no glory.

Thursday, January 06, 2005

Sunday 02/01/05

Pi jumpa uncle at his hotel that morning and he gave me some pocket money enuf la to survive for a while , and skali bayar trying to pay hutang overdraft.

Afternoon, arif came, he looked so miserable...kitorg dok kat common room and he cried and cried...he felt like wanna commit suicide, and gave up on life....on top of that, he thought one of the ways to die with honour is to join the army....lama gak la pujok2 dia....

Ptg tu shihab dtg...arif felt lot better....and they both left me that evening. Shihab went all the way to stansted airport and left for dublin early next morning.

new year 01/01/2005

Siang tu, saturday, nothing much and basically just preparing all my works....ptg tu waheedah balik ke vellacott and she and rajesh ajak pi alperton...i gi jer la...sbb tak penah sampai sana kan...not bad la, we ate at kebabish spring chicken and chicken briyani all share bertiga. Waheedah belikan saree utk majidah.

Mlm tu lpak2 sat kat bilik waheedah and balik bilik jer around 2am, arif called finally...We agreed to see each other the next day, sunday.

new year'eve

Friday, 31st dec , azizah came to my place and kitorg saje nak hiburkan hati masing2 and sambut new year....she said her family dah jumpa family yazid and next weekend bertunang within her family and his.

24th-29th dec 2004

Mama sampai ke london from bradford at vic coach stn around 2.20pm, friday, 24th dec, and me, shihab, took mama and samihah on a cab home to my place. That day diorg makan mee goreng balance from masak earlier that week, and dinner i buat tandoori chicken.

I tried to ctct arif since thursday 23rd dec...i last saw n spoke to arif on tuesday and wed morning. On Friday, i ctcted his place again and his bros said they havent seen him around...strange enuf....and yeah he didnt make it at all at vic coach stn that friday. Dec 25th, xmas, we got invitation from majidah for a dinner with her family along with waheedah and hanis. Pon takde langsong calls from him....and that evening, during dinner, i got a txt msg from his sis saying that there was a big argument and he walked outta the house. Me n my mum were so upset....

Boxing day, 26th dec, all 4 of us went to damas gate and bought food for the eve. We made basboussa for dessert and chicken kicap for dinner.

Monday morning, 27th dec, 1st Next Sale, and we all went there in oxford st. Bought some clothes for meself, and they bought some clothes as presents as well. We came home in the eve feeling rather exhausted and i made spaghetti bolognese.

Tuesday, went out to hammersmith area, shopped at primark. Nahla came later that day and that eve, k.long and family came as well....masak la lauk kurma ayam, nasi minyak, acar and sayur campor..and then terus abiskan kerja2 packing barang2 mama and samihah. Meah slept at my room while me, tatat, mama, and shihab at waheedah's that night.

Pagi wednesday, and still nothing from arif....azizah offered to cook nasi lemak with sambal, telor dadar and ayam goreng...we were actually planned to do all that , but because azizah have already prepared for us, kitorg just masak another pot of nasi lemak and rebus telor, and potong timun. That sambal was sooo pedas tapi at least sumer dpt breakfast. Around 1.00pm, cab dtg and we load all the luggage and left to heathrow...k.long n family antar sampai my place jer.

Kat airport, lpas check in, me, nahla, shihab antar diorg kat departure hall.

Mlm tu nahla and me went to see uncle rahmat...sajer2 jer..and coz i was already so penat that day....sempat la kemas bilik sket.

Thursday, continue kemas ape2 yg patot and then went to send nahla to vic coach stn. Ptg tu rasa sedih and lonely jer.